Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Being average

I think that being average has been so under rated all over the world whereas it is not as bad as it is made to sound.

I always find myself in an average situation. Like today, I did average on my test. Yes, out of a class of 18 students, I probably stood at the 9th position, just average. When I was younger, I was this plump girl with braces who probably nobody noticed in the class, I strived, I lost the braces and the weight but what I couldn’t compete with was that there were always thinner and prettier girls in our class. I even improved my grades at college and masters level but guess what, there were always a lot of people beating me up in those grades. I listened to music and read a lot of books but I still come across people who have heard more and read more. I started writing and painting but then I knew that they would be people to beat me to it too! I never knew what it was to be number 1 and I think I probably will never know. It’s not because I don’t try hard enough but…..who knows why :)

In spite of being this average being, I must admit to you today that I have a wonderful life! I must tell you the pros of being average are that when you do find yourself doing better than your expectation, you have so much to celebrate about. Being average also means, doing a lot of things. Yeah, you can dance, sing, read, and participate in any sport you want, without having the pressure to stand number 1. The only fear I don’t have is that of failing myself because I will always go for that extra mile just before killing myself.

It also means receiving extra love, no one ever sees you as a potential threat! That is so great for me since I love being around people…I love the fact that I can be greeted by innocent smiles rather than those sneaky smirks of jealousy or rejection. What I love the most is that I can hold hands with the strong and the weak and make my own path.

So…those of you who feel down and out being perfect or imperfect…think about being average..did I mention: Being Average ROCKS!

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Hide and seek

Today is just another day in Stuttgart where the sun plays hide and seek with the clouds. Yeah, it seems rather amusing to watch the sun go in and out of what seems like oblivion. I know it can't sense how deeply it is wanted on a weekend like this, but I so wish to see it emerge out strong.

As I watch the sun by my window, it seems to strike just the right chord with my spirit. It's how my soul exhibits its moods on such days. Sometimes my spirit soars at the sight of the sun and on the other just slips in to gloomy colours of the cloudy grey. A sense of belonging and then all of a sudden a sense of the exclusion. I try so hard to battle my imperfections and yet sometimes, there is no way out, the clouds just seem to shadow my effort like they seem to filter the sunlight today. The wind seems to be singing a new tune, it tries to push away these dull clouds to give way to the sun. This is some what like my inner thoughts which give a constant way out to all self doubts I have building up. "What does today have in store for me", I guess this is the question which the  land on which I stand today asks as well..Will it be sunny or will i just lie in the shadows...The constant hide and seek in the cloud is in complete harmony with my soul right now...

Yeah...its just another day in my little world of oblivion...I wish to rise out of these shadows of self doubt and more..and may be get a broader view of the sky..until then...I try to find the rhythm in these skies..